For Pete’s Sake, Listen To The Band!

2:51 PM GMT 25/01/2008

MOJO’s Phil Sutcliffe is tired of hearing morons chatter through gigs. In fact, he’s mad as hell!

“No matter what else is wrong with music, no matter how the internet uproar plays out, live gigs are booming because fans love to be there, experience the real thing and be in the moment.”

Yadayada.

It’s the Water Rats, King’s Cross, North London. Good new band on tonight. You find a spot towards the back of the room as the singer says “Hi” and they whack the opening chord… then the bloke in front of you turns to his mate and shouts, “Did you see the fight then? Bloody Hatton!”

“Yeah, all that hype and friggin’ useless!” his mate shouts back. “Another let-down for British sport!”

“Yeah, after the football and the…”

And they’re off. You‘re trying to listen to the band while, with every decibel it takes to outgun a howling lead guitar, these two pillocks bellow half-remembered clichés culled from tabloid back pages.

So you move away, scouting for lips that aren’t moving, get settled again… until the git now adjacent shouts at his neighbour, “Like I was saying, I was down 43 by lunchtime and up to my arse in alligators, thought I was screwed this time!”… so you move again, in among a handful of solos who seem to be just listening to the band… until the woman to your left shouts into her mobile, “Well, it got a bit chilly so I thought about putting a jumper on, then it turned out nice after all so I didn’t!”

Aaaaaargh!

A silent scream, of course. But this happens all the time now. Go to a gig and half the audience is talking. Incessantly and at maximum volume. You want to see a band. You buy a ticket. You don’t listen. And you make it impossible for everyone in your extensive earshot to listen.

Ask them to turn it down and they get huffy. Ask why they’re shouting and they say, “Because the bastard band’s playing so loud!”

“In the moment” my arse. Huge numbers of people who attend live music do so in body alone. If they’re not shouting they’re holding up mobile phones to relay the show to a friend (conveying the sound quality of a hacksaw turned up to 11) or to take pictures (terrible pictures: “Ooh look, there’s a light! And there’s a bloke! I think!”).

Societally, it might almost be tragic if it weren’t so annoying. It seems to say, “I’m here, but I’m not here!” Is that egocentricity? Or vulnerability? Shouting so you don’t hear, taking pictures so you don’t see; anything to get some separation between you and experiencing “the real thing” which might… move you?

Well, dear reader, if you’re a gig shouter, on the one hand, bloody sod you. Or, on the other teeth-grindingly better mannered hand, please stop. If talking’s what you really want to do, take it somewhere else.

You know. Be. Here. Now. It’s all right.

Phil Sutcliffe

Posted by Danny_Eccleston at 2:51 PM GMT 25/01/2008

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Couldn't agree more Phil. Gobshites who talk through a gig get right up my nose as well.About a year back I politely asked one guy, who was standing right behind me, to keep his voice down. He responded to this by calling me a C***. Not amused by that, but not wanting to get chucked out, I asked him to repeat what he had said and explained to him that OTHERS were getting peed off with his ramblings. Luckily, he apologised and headed for the bar. I have since pointed out to other 'Disinterested Parties' that the bar was quieter for talking and that everyone around were objecting. It has worked pretty well so far, even earning me a small round of applause at a Roundhouse Super Furry Animals gig. Just a shame that the bar is in the concert area!

Posted by Ian D at 7:09 PM GMT 25/01/2008 Report Abuse

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OMG! I am so sorry to hear that this happens in Britian too. I thought this was merely an American phenomenan and especially reserved for the 20 something crowd. WAH!

I have nearly gotten into an actual fist-fight over this same matter. Gotta tell ya, I'm an old lady (45), but I'm a former p-rocker who is not afraid of anyone. I have slam-danced in mosh pits (before it became fashionable) and did some stage-diving in my day and it could have been an interesting night for both of us!

SHUT UP ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Zellah-Chicago at 7:33 PM GMT 25/01/2008 Report Abuse

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I've more or less stopped going to gigs because of people who who want to talk all the way through the music. It came to a head with me during a Steely dan gig a few years ago, when some drunk guy behind me kept talking to his friend very loudly and also bellowing over whatever Donald Fagen was singing. I got up and moved, but I decided I'd rather just listen to music at home, where I can listen without distractions. For similar reasons, we've stopped going to the cinema.

Posted by sound_chaser at 5:21 PM GMT 27/01/2008 Report Abuse

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RE: sound_chaser

As a wedding anniversary present for my wife a few years back, I got her (and me) tickets to a show at an amphitheater in Washington DC on a cool September night, featuring Bonnie Raitt, Bruce Hornsby, Sean Colvin, and Jackson Browne. And a back-up band lead by David Lindley. The cool thing was they each came out and accompanied each other---Bruce Hornsby backing up Bonnie Raitt on piano, Jackson and Bonnie singing with Sean Colvin. A unique opportunity.

Except everyone talked all through the show. Shouting over the music about that girl in the office and her hot outfit, did so and so think he'd get the project done in time, how's that new car running, etc.

Except when Jackson Browne came on. Then they just cheered for him--even more loudly. Like they'd never heard of or even might ever be interested in the others.

So why do people who talk at gigs pay money to get it? It's not like we're talking laying down a buck to get in at the door for a local band. I think the show I'm talking about cost $30 or $40 dollars a ticket. Boggle my mind why folks don't go to a local bar where they can drink and talk and get if for nothing!!! Why pay big bucks for something you don't care about?

I could almost see it if it's some guy trying to pick up a girl, but most often, it's stuff like I mentioned above: two guys talking about cars or two women talking about clothes--or vice versa, so I'm not accused of being sexist.

Jerks. Not you, the talkers.

Posted by Jeff Lindholm at 1:32 AM GMT 03/02/2008 Report Abuse

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Thanks Phil,

I was beginning to think I was just a grumpy old man, but I'm glad to see it's not just me. I went to see Steve Earle at a local gig here in Byron Bay, Australia, and was so embarrassed at the noise level throughout Alison Moorer's support set that I wanted to go backstage and apologise for the rudeness of the locals and assure her that some of us were actually trying to listen.

But it's a pandemic. I find it truly baffling why people pay and then don't listen. Or at least shut up so others can listen. WHY ARE THEY THERE?!?!? This has actually caused a row between me and my wife when I lost my patience in the cinema and turned around to tell the idiots behind us to "shut the f**k up!", - she was upset with my rudeness and bad manners, - but come on, - I'm only flesh and blood!

Yes, I admit it. I am a serial SHUSHER.

Regards,
Karl

Posted by Karl Farren at 11:22 PM GMT 07/02/2008 Report Abuse

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This happens too much nowadays, it's these type of people who talk all the way through a gig and then brag to their mates "I was there" after completely ignoring the band.
I saw Prince last summer at one of his legendary aftershows at Indigo2 and a large proportion of the audience were either talking during the performance or staggering around in a drunken stupor whilst missing an amazing performance.
And don't get me started on them pesky camera phones... nobody wants to see your low quality clips on YouTube, thanks all the same!

Posted by pacey68 at 4:22 AM GMT 10/02/2008 Report Abuse

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Another thing that annoys me is drunk middle aged women who go out once a year and insist on pushing others out the way to dance around their handbags. This happened when I got dragged out for the sterophonics in cardiff for another Kelly Jones money making gig

Posted by A TO THE OC at 7:06 PM GMT 14/03/2008 Report Abuse

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I couldn't agree more with you. That's another reason why I prefer gigs where you can stand as then you at least have a chance of moving away from the worse offenders. It all proves that many go to gigs to look 'cool' and don't have real interest in the music, they take the (awful) phone pics and phone their mates just to prove what a 'great' social life they have. Some genuinely ring and take pics as they are over the moon to see the artist, but thats even sadder as they are ruining it for themselves. Just enjoy the moment, you won't get it back.

Posted by Aymi at 3:17 PM GMT 03/06/2008 Report Abuse

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